How to decrease stress?

Stress, anxiety, trauma, sounds familiar? Indeed! On a broad base, there are two types of stresses. Minor stress, which are the everyday stresses, e.g being late to a meeting, small arguments with colleague or friends, having to work for longer hours, missing an appointment and etc, etc. The second one is the major stress. This has to do with longterm issues and can have devastating effects on us. For e.g. stress of a divorce, death of a close person, being fired from the job, major illness etc. So what to do when faced with such situations? The following are some of the ways that can help us reduce our anxieties.

1. Confront them.
   We have to deal with the minor stresses almost on daily basis and we can’t get away from major ones either, although they don’t occur as frequently as the minor ones. So indeed if we have to face these situations, why not confront them in a sensible manner? Why do we have to lose our heads over them? Why can’t we take these situations as they are? Why do we have to be so deeply tensed about them and let them ruin our lives? The rational way to behave when moments of stress knocks your door, is to let them enter, talk to them in details and in a reasonable way. Open up your mind to the whole conversation. Ask questions such as what happened? How did that happen? What are the possible reasons? What is my next step? Unless you do that, you won’t be able to understand the causes of your stress, second, you won’t be in a position to take the next logical step because you weren’t going right about it in the first place. Confrontation should be our priority when faced with moments of despair.

2. Take them as a challenge.
We are faced with all sorts of challenges in our lives. We face challenges of getting good grades, challenges of doing a good job in office, of being a responsible parent, of being healthy and etc. So if you are ready to take those situations as challenges, why shouldn’t you consider “stress” just another battle too? A battle that you wanna have a go at and give your best.

3. Be positive.
You know when we are distressed or anxious, it is not just because of the problems that we are facing but the amount of negativity that we have accumulated in us. “Oh, what is going to happen if i went to work now, is my boss going to fire me? Is he really going to humiliate me in front of all my co-workers? It is all my fault, how couldn’t i get up by the alarm clock? These are the sort of negative thoughts that you want to refrain from. Not only just because they are bad for your health but they are useless, really. How could you compile such a big pile of negative thoughts when you don’t really know what’s going to happen? What’s done is done, you can’t do nothing about it. Sensible approach is to stay positive and hope for the best.

10 movies to watch before you die

1.Godfather (1972).

Apart from the fact that it is considered one of the best movies of all time, it is unique in a way that it not only depicts life of mafias but it teaches you love and affection at the same time. The love of the head of a family for his family, love of a young man for a woman, sense of responsibility, about politics and how loyalty is vital specially to your close ones.

2.Life is beautiful (1997).

The most uplifting movie you could ever watch! The main protagonist is a guy who has immense love in his heart as he chases for the woman of his dreams. His deep affection for his child and how he tries to protect him from the brutalities of the Nazis shows his character of deep strength. If you are a sentimental person, this movie is just for you.

3.Schindler’s list (1993).

True story of a businessman who attempts to save the lives of hundreds of jewish refugees during the holocaust by hiring them in his factories. it conveys us a message for the need to respect and protect every innocent life.

4.Braveheart (1995).

Inspirational, up-lifting account of a Scottish warrior who guides his country to independence against England.

5.The passion of christ (2004).

A biblical drama film depicting the passion of Jesus, although it is criticised for its intense violence, it is a film which would make you realise a lot of things.

6.Ikiru (1952).

A bureaucrat who upon finding about his terminal illness seeks to find meaning in his life. If you are a person who wants to know how one feels when death is next door, this movie is a must watch.

7.To kill a mockingbird (1962).

Story of a lawyer who attempts to defend a black man who at the time had no civil rights. Along with the right to stand with the truth, this movie indicates us how one should up bring their children.

8.Eat, pray, love (2010).

An intriguing story of a woman who had everything a woman desires for. But still she finds herself in the middle of nowhere. Her journey to find answers to her uncertainties is inspiring.

9.A moment to remember (2004).

Heartbreaking, heart-rending, full of grief and a beautifully portrayed love story of two souls. If this film doesn’t make you cry, nothing will.

10.City lights (1931).

A silent romantic comedy film and one of the finest ones of Chaplin. This movie is combination of humour and love, can you ask for anything more fascinating?

What is the most important thing that makes great people, Great?

By great, i mean exceptional, extra ordinary, special, distinctive, remarkable. So how do people achieve uncommon feats? What makes them so rare that we have to put them in these lists of outstanding individuals and not regard them as any other human beings? Sure, they have same features, same brain, same body as you and i have. But how do they get ahead of us?

Persistence is the word that comes to my mind when i talk about them. Along with great qualities of optimism, humility, imagination, capability, fearlessness, encouragement, the one that matters the most in the long run, is their perseverance, their life long commitment to their vision. If you ever listen to them or read them, they would tell you, the core ingredient of their success was to keep on pushing in what they believed.

Most of these people that we call them now as remarkable individuals, were once called crazy, out of their mind, irrational, illogical people who didn’t know what they were doing. But as it turns out, they took all the beatings and were as steadfast in their madness as ever. It was their perseverance that eventually enlisted them in the books of history and highly achieved people. Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Dhirubhai Ambani, Andre Agassi, Louis Armstrong sure had a vision and passion in them. But to be honest with you, that vision can go away pretty quickly if you are mocked, and labeled with all sorts of ridicules and scorns. Keep on pushing no matter what, is all that matters and eventually that tenacity would help you realise your dream. Some people would argue that having a vision and being optimistic about it is more important, sure having a dream is important to achieve greatness and is in fact the initial step towards mastery but if you don’t have the perseverance with it, to avoid all the obstacles that comes along with it, how do you expect to achieve the unthinkable?!

Having a dream, a desire to do the inconceivable, is significant to achieving greatness but more so significant is our commitment to it.

How to get rid of jealousy?

Enviousness, covetousness, jealousy is the desiring of something belonging to someone else. It could be anything from wealth, status to happiness, love and beauty. The typical jealous mindset says that if someone has something, why doesn’t he have it? why doesn’t he have the Ferrari? why is he not the owner of that big house? why is he not as famous as that actor? or why is he not intelligent as the guy next door? As a result he despises them. He hates the very fact that someone is superior than him. Such people also think that if they can’t have something, others should not have them too. If they can’t afford to buy a farm or be a billionaire my friend or my neighbour shouldn’t be able too. They can’t stand someone owning something that he is unable to.

How to disown this hurtful trait?

1.Find a goal:                                                                                                                                                  You would be saying, how come finding a goal is linked to ridding of jealousy. Well, it is very much so. When you find out what you really want to achieve in life, automatically, your whole focus is shifted to achieving that thing and only that thing. You have no time for resentment and enviousness. You don’t bother thinking about your neighbour who recently bought a Rolls Royce. You have got your own target to work towards. So put aside all the discontentments for others and ask yourself, what is my aim? what do i want to achieve in life? what am i so passionate about? what is my obsession? Believe me once you answer these questions you are too occupied to be bothered by others.

2.Change your attitude:
“Your mind can be your best friend or your worst enemy.” It is so applicable here if you notice. This neighbour of yours has got a better job than you, he is well off, got a loving family. Now it is totally up to you, either to envy him and wish his job be taken and he leads a miserable life or on the other hand you take inspiration from him and learn from him, notice the good things about him and trying to apply them on yourself. You see, it’s all about attitude. Tell yourself, “if he can do it, so can i, after all he is just a human being as i am.” You just have to have that confidence in you and how sensibly you go about it.

But what about the inborn qualities that people have?

You would be wondering now, ok that is that, but what about the naturally talented people. People who are born intelligent, or beautiful or lucky. First of all does it matter to you? Has it caused you any harm or given you any benefits? No! so why even bother? But you would be saying, you hate them for that very fact that they got something for free and that’s eating you inside. Well, if that is the case, then ask yourself, are there some people who might be saying the same thing about you? And believe me, you would find lots of people who wished they were as privileged as you. It may be the family that you are born into, or the place you belong to, or maybe for some bizarre reason they do find you attractive! Just kidding, but trust me there are people out there. As far as intelligence or luck is concerned, well you tell me, being born genius or fortunate is exciting or working hard and earning it and one day realising, “WOW! I am super smart and fortunate and you know what? I wasn’t born with it but i worked my ass off for it and i am proud of myself!” After all this is what makes life so exciting, having to earn something and being proud of it! Isn’t it? God! Life would so boring if i was gifted with all the life’s fortunes and i didn’t have to reach out for them.

Being jealous of someone isn’t something to be ashamed of. In fact if used in a positive way, it could take us along way. Life isn’t fair, you know it and i know it and this is what makes it exhilarating.